The 46 Challenge Tip #2: Dates have to be adaptive
Joe Knows! Question #1

It's not about the nails. Taking my girls to get their nails done.

Recently, I had a fun talk with a friend. I was talking about my upcoming day.

“I’m going to take my wife to do a little necessary shopping, then take her for a pedicure and my girls to get their nails painted.”

“At a nail salon?”

“Yep,” I replied preparing to move onto the next topic.

“That just seems like such a waste of time to me...” my friend replied.

“Why?”

“Well, it doesn’t last.”

“True, but it’s not about the nails or the paint job on them.”

“True...” was my friend’s reply.

So as soon as I’m done publishing this post, that’s where I’m headed. I’m going to take my wife for that shopping and get my girls nails done.

In a few days, heck maybe in a few hours the paint jobs will probably be chipped and peeling. Nobody can tear up some nails like country girls. If the point was for my girls to look all girly, I will fail. It’s not that they can’t look all girly, when they want to look that way. It’s just that isn’t the point of this little exercise. The point of this exercise is that I want them to know that they are three of the most important four women in my life.

I want them to know that I love them and that they matter to me. Because they matter to me, the things that matter to them matter to me.

For a few dollars, I have the opportunity to help them feel special.

In a world that is increasingly demanding my time I want my girls to know that sometimes spending money on something that “doesn’t make sense” makes perfect sense because it helps them to feel like they are enough.

In a world that will bombard them for the rest of their lives with the message that they are not enough.

        They are not beautiful enough

        They are not smart enough

        They are not big boobed enough

        They are not small boobed enough

        They are not tall enough

        They are not short enough

        They are not long/short legged enough

        They are not feminine enough

        They are not tough enough

        They are not weak enough

        They are not “princessy” enough

        They are not anti-princessy enough

        They are not _______ enough

                They

                        simply

                                are not

                                        ENOUGH.

I want them to know they are enough. They are worth 15 dollars to get their nails painted so that for a few hours or a few days they can have a visual reminder of how important to me they are.

As a father, I want to intentionally create a culture that paints a canvas of expectations for them to carry into adulthood.

It’s not bad to want to feel pretty.

It’s not bad to want your man to spend some money on you.

Sometimes, it’s OK to spend some money for fun just because it’s fun.

Incidentally, last night when I told the girls today’s plans, all three did this whisper, “YES!”

If I’m totally transparent, there is no way to put a money value on that. It’s priceless and certainly that’s part of the point of today’s little trip.

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